I have now been working for a full week again, after a month of unemployment, and it feels good. Although the job is just a means to an end and has absolutely no future, it has been giving me strength and motivation to continue moving forward. The job itself is humiliating. Years ago, when I first left this organization, I swore I would never even step foot in one of these establishments again. Something I had been able to do for over 10 years. After that, I had been very successful in a number of organizations and companies. I was always on a track to be promoted, to lead and accept more responsibility. And now, I just have to make sure I show up on time and not screw up. Every day I go to work, I hope that I won’t see anyone I know. Though the past few days, I fought off that worry, I just don’t care. I need this job to earn an income so I can continue to build and once I’ve achieved enough, I can move forward again and focus on building my career again.
This job gives me purpose though. It gives me a reason to wake up every morning and strive to succeed. The more I work, the closer I get to achieving something on the list. Although I am humiliated that I must go to this workplace every day, the fact is, I put myself in this position, and now I need to do whatever it takes to be a man again. This job is another lesson in humility and when I come out on the other side as a man I can be proud of, I won’t forget these days, like I did before, I’ll remember them and keep these lessons close to me.